Visitations

I was in Great Foster parent of these two wonderful kids for 5 years but unfortunately at the time they were taken was at my weakest point the caseworker know about but never help me out and just waited me to quit. All I want is my kids to know that I'm around just say be there for them whenever they need and I also want to tell them that I do love them because at the time when they were taken it was horrible for all of us and I know till this day they have questions that I cannot answer and it's not fair because not only I failed them but the system failed them. All I'm asking for is visitations and I understand that they can can't do it because biological parent I don't think it's right because honestly biological parents out of the crazy world that also kill and two nasty things that are kids and they don't know how lucky they are to have them. I also don't understand that how can I have chance after chance and I can't even have one chance that one my case was close it was not enough evidence . I just hope someone with a heart and someone that believes not judging people on their past please get back to me. I miss them they are my world