Help The London Bombing Victims!

Pity the poor people who aren't connected to the bombings at all, but are going to tell you how to react anyway.

We. the undersigned, express our sympathies for the American victims of the London tube bombings. Many Americans fell victim to craniorectal inversion, such was the force of the blast. The bombings did not respect class, nationality, or geography, and missed more people than it hit, though a lot of these victims of craniorectal inversion were newly recovered from Acquired 9/11 Dislocated Victim Empathy Syndrome. It was also discovered that the severity of both conditions was directly proportional to the geographical and social distance to each event.

We, the undersigned, believe that therefore it is the responsibility of the Internet community to raise Internet dollars and present these unfortunate victims with money to buy a sense of humor. And also to bake a cake that looks like the British flag, because they like doing that sort of thing.

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